Responsibility

How Do I Express My Needs in a Relationship? With Briana MacWilliam

Lasting Love

Over the next few weeks, Briana Macwilliams an Attachment Therapist and I will be sharing a 4-part video series about adult attachment, love and relationships, based on frequently asked questions we regularly receive.

One question we get is: “How do I express my needs in a relationship?”

Such a simple, yet complicated question, isn’t it?… Continue reading Here

Is There Space For Both Personalities In Your Relationship?

Personalities

Personalities

Committed relationships are fundamentally difficult because they require the collision of two separate individuals with different life experiences, values, and personalities to love each other. For this very reason, 69% of relationship problems are unsolvable.

How depressing is that?

Surprisingly you don’t have to transform your partner’s personality to have a great relationship.… Continue reading Here

Defensiveness Doesn’t Protect a Relationship

Defensive

Defensive
Being defensive blocks connection, compassion, and isolates you from your partner. Instead of focusing on we-ness, a defensive person focuses on me-ness. Defensiveness is one of the most dangerous signs of toxic fighting because it creates never-ending cycles of negativity.… Continue reading Here

Transforming Criticism into Wishes: A Recipe for Successful Conflict

Wishing

Wishing

This article was originally published on The Gottman Relationship Blog.

In the heat of an argument, it’s far easier to say what we don’t want than what we do. Stan Tatkin, the founder of the psychobiological approach to couple therapy, proposes that people are better built for war than love.… Continue reading Here

There Are Two Views to Every Conflict and Both Are Valid

Conflict

Conflict

This article was originally published on The Gottman Relationship Blog

Heather’s voice raises as she says, “How can you not see it my way? It’s the truth and you know it. You’re just too stubborn to admit it!”

Jason responds, “That’s not what happened at all.… Continue reading Here

Do You Bottle Your Emotions? Susan David, Ph.D. Describes How It Hurts Your Relationship

Do You Bottle Your Emotions? Susan David, Ph.D. Describes How It Hurts Your Relationship

Emotions

Interviewed by Kyle Benson For  The Gottman Relationship Blog

Susan David, Ph.D. is an award-winning psychologist on the faculty of Harvard Medical School and the CEO of Evidence Based Psychology, a boutique business consultancy. Her new book Emotional Agility: Get Unstuck, Embrace Change, and Thrive in Work and Life teaches a counterintuitive approach to achieving your true potential, which was heralded by the Harvard Business Review as a groundbreaking idea of the year in 2016.Continue reading Here

Repairs During Conflict are a Superpower of Emotionally Connected Couple

Conflict Repairs

Conflict Repairs

This article was originally published on Verily

When you think about it, every couple in every relationship is set up for failure. It is impossible to be emotionally available to your partner 100 percent of the time. In fact, you will miss most of your partner’s bids for emotional connection out of mindlessness.… Continue reading Here

4 Marriage Myths That Ruin Marriages Without Partners Realizing It

Marriage

MarriageMarriage

This article was originally published on The Gottman Relationship Blog. 

As soon as the engagement ring is slipped on, we are inundated with messages about how our relationship should be. Our friends and family tell us what we should tolerate and what we shouldn’t.… Continue reading Here

4 Steps to Overcome Gridlock That Harms Relationships

Overcome

Overcome

This article was originally published on The Gottman Relationship Blog

All couples are bound to have arguments. When they struggle to manage these ongoing disagreements with constructive conflict conversations, the result is what Dr. John Gottman calls “gridlock.”

 

Gridlock is like a Chinese Finger Trap.… Continue reading Here